Saturday, 10 May 2008

Men, Real Men, Real Honky Tonk Men, & Otherwise

You will notice off my list of magazines to read.....I did leave Esquire off the list. Frankly, its hard for me to get into Esquire....I believe its for a certain type of guy....just not me (normally). This month's issue features an interesting article (not that I would normally read Esquire, you know). There are 75 skills that every man should have....or at least in Esquire's opinion. I was open....I read it.

Frankly, some of these skills are precisely what I have today. Yes....I can tell someone advice that matters in one sentence, if necessary. Yes....I can tell if someone is lying. Yes.....I can name a book that matters (you just won't read it though). Yes.....I can write a letter or even a blog. Yes.....I can calculate square footage. Yes.....I can shuffle a deck of cards and jump-start a car if necessary.

But then the skills got tough. No....cooking something like meat on something besides the grill.....why? Tell a woman her dress size.....doesn't she know already? Explain a light year.....I don't intend to travel in such a manner that requires a description. Know some bird types....sure....ok....chicken and turkey (turkey is better for a sandwich, I know). Negotiate a better price...if the guy put up a sign for $99....I'm assuming he is pretty sure about the price. Chop down a tree? Well...a chain saw is alot faster.

These skills that Esquire wrote up....just aren't on my list. My important skills would include (1) knowing the in's and out's of septic tank replacement, (2) making perfect ice tea, (3) slicing damn thin lemon slices for my ice tea, (4) setting the timing on a 1974 Chevy pick-up, (4) Grilling six different meats (including Ostrich) on the grill at one time, (5) knowing how to speak very very very low to the lady in the tube top at Dairy Queen so she has to lean over the counter, and (6) knowing how to evacuate New Orleans if a hurricane is forecasted. These are remarkable skills to have....and guys ought to learn them.

1 comment:

Momma Bear said...

Ostrich?? But.. it has a gamey stringy feel in your mouth. Ewwwwwwww..

PS.. the secret to the "PERFECT" sweet tea.. is to boil it WITH the sugar in it.. then.. put in fridge to cool off.. perfect ice cubes matter too. Gotta use the pure stuff! Might I suggest Ozarka water?? But, make sure it comes from Arkansas and NOT Texas! lol