Friday, 23 July 2010

The Mess

"We are starting to have trouble finding oil."

Words spoken by former commander Thad Allen (now retired and working directly for Homeland Security and still in charge....in some manner...of the Gulf oil mess).

On a daily basis....depending on which news service you read....there are between 500 and 1000 vessels out trying to find oil to collect on the surface. In recent days...they appear to have peaked out. Course, the Gulf is pretty big area and it's possible that things have peaked (we'd like to believe this).

Maybe BP is reaching a conclusion and can actually open up a keg of beer to celebrate over this peak. There are a lot of folks who've worked continuously since day one...and probably would appreciate a couple of days off right now.

As for the damage done? Well...yeah...some businesses are a year or two away from returning to normal. That's the sad part about this whole mess.

You'd hope that there is a government agency out there...whose job is to write down lessons learned and force folks to remember not to do stupid things. My guess is that this will all be forgotten within three years...and repeated again within seven. That's the sad part about this story.

The Henge Story

Some guys in Britain had this suspicious idea of a another Stonehenge. This week, they admit that they've found...pretty much across the field from the first one.

For those of you who've never been to Stonehenge...it'd be best to describe this big open cow-field....with a road running down the middle of it...and you see this big rocks over on the right side. You pull over to a side road and then realize this vast parking lot which is intentionally dug out so you can't see it.

The tour boys want their cash out of letting you get close and personal to the rocks...so you have to pay...to see anything up close and personal. You circle the thing...never getting within sixty feet of it...and eventually realize you are in the midst of a cow-field...with some big fancy rocks that someone dragged up to point toward some direction.

I'm sorry if I spoiled your vision of the mythical legend.

This "twin" of Stonehenge...is being checked out closely. It's about half a mile from the big one....and lacks stones (obviously explaining why it was missed for centuries).

The key thing about this Stonehenge...it's got 22 holes...and instead of rocks...it's got evidence of wooden posts.

So I pondered here. Over four thousand years ago...there were probably these two British dudes...Larry and Earl. Neither guy was that bright, and they had this aversion to hard work...at least in the minds of most folks.

Larry and Earl eventually came to this funny idea of putting up some logs in the ground...calling it a special place for observing stars...and it was called "Loghenge". It was possible...in Larry's mind...that you gained a vast appreciation of time, the sun, and bodily fluids...by standing in the middle of this.

Earl went out and hauled up dozens of local folks who all got into this log circle...and wanted to feel 'special'. The key plus on this deal...was all the babes were into this trendy log business.

Weeks passed...months passed...and some guys got to feel kinda negative about this whole mess. Larry and Earl were taking up valuable crop time by pretending on special events with the sun and stars. In fact...neither guy really worked much at all.

So Monty and Erwin came out one day...and spent two weeks hauling some big hefty rocks around. They figured out the dimensions of the logs planted in the ground and the direction of things. Larry and Earl watched on and could not figure out the ultimate purpose of this.

Finally....Erwin announced to the crowd gazing at things...that this was the new and improved Stonehenge...with authentic 'magic' rocks...and lit up a fire in the middle with a bunch of funny smelling vines and such tossed on top that raised up a huge aroma. The babes quickly circled Monty and you knew that new spot was a 5-star joint.

Larry and Earl? Well...logs just aren't the same as stones. So as the days passed...both guys took to drinking...and eventually fell down drunk in the midst of their log appartus....and at that moment...one of the logs which had rotted a bit.....fell over on the two guys...killing them both.

Days passed around the area, with a lot of folks talking about Larry and Earl. At some point...the folks over at the Stonehenge held a ceremony to bless Larry and Earl...and every year...on one special day....the sun would cross some rock, and that was the special day to remember the two guys.

Folks from miles and miles would come to honor Larry and Earl as the years and decades passed. Eventually, they forgot their names but remembered the purpose of the Stonehenge as being a nifty place to meet...consume some beverages...and meet lusty babes from the local area.

And that's how Loghenge got forgotten and Stonehenge continued on.