Thursday, 21 April 2011

The Sad Thing Is......

The sad thing is......if you announced Hulk Hogan the wrestler was running as a Republican for President right now.....he'd take twenty-two percent of the national vote.

The sad thing is.....you have about the same amount of trust in the Aircraft Controller at 2AM in the morning....as you have for the Walmart employee scanning your purchase at 2AM in the morning.....as you have for the guy making your waffles at the Waffle House at 2AM in the morning....as you have for the kid who is running a 7-11 shop at 2AM in the morning.....as you have for a cop on the beat at 2AM in the morning.  Never once do you think about why exactly you do all these things at 2AM in the morning or why you might be out.

The sad thing is.....if some joker showed up at the county court house to get a brand new license out of thin air and said they didn't have a birth certificate.....they'd walk out empty handed.

The sad thing is.....more folks respect Charlie Sheen.....than respect Katie Couric.

The sad thing is.....a majority of American teenage girls would actually like the idea of vampire hot lusty guys walking around in real life.

The sad thing is.....most American guys would readily adapt to watching Canadian-style football, if the NFL dumps the season entirely.

The sad thing is.....President Obama could walk into a bar and shoot forty Republicans and announce the dismantling of the Statue of Liberty, and he'd still likely win next year's election.

The sad thing is.....more folks believe one of the top American priorities is to bring high-speed internet to everyone's home....than believe in replacing crappy old bridges they cross to work each day which are about to fall down.

The sad thing is....if you simply forced all cigarette companies to remove all chemicals in tobacco and make them nature-free....then ninety percent of folks could quit smoking within a year.  But who would pay all the taxes associated with chemically-dependent smokes?

The sad thing is....most Americans can't tell you where Libya, Venezuela, North Korea or Cuba are located on a map.

The sad thing is.....more Americans know more about the septic tank in their back yard than they know about economics.

The sad thing is.....more Americans have attended a college football game than have attended a single city hall or county commission meeting once in their life.

The sad thing is.....more folks in Florida take Oxycodone than in the other forty-nine states combined.  Adding to this, we are trusting them as registered voters to be competent enough stand there and know who they voted for....two minutes after they left the polling station.

The sad thing is.....forty Russian mafia guys in Libya would have taken Colonel Qaddafi down in sixteen days, replaced the entire government, and stolen the assets of the national bank of Libya.

The sad thing is....aliens could land in Wisconsin, and still be page two news to the union versus the state episode.

The sad thing is.....more folks in Bama, if given a choice of awarding "cult status" to Scientology or the Mormons.....would pick the Mormons.

The sad thing is....if we had a key technology for cars that would recognize Johnny Juniors key (at age 16) and cut half the power to the car.....then we'd cut accidents in America with kids under eighteen by fifty percent.

The sad thing is....folks who tend to buy battery-powered cars which require a charge-up in their garage.....have never grasped that electrical power to their house actually comes in a form of a bill each month.

The sad thing is....most folks who continually complain about a bad back.....probably have a mattress that is over ten years old.

The sad thing is....a cat can remove more stress from your life than two six-packs of beer per day.

The sad thing is....there are actually people who would readily pay $12k for various tattoos to be painted on their body than to put the money into a IRA at age 25 and have $100k at age 65 from that starter amount.

The sad thing is.....most of your actual true fundamental American rights....could be written on a 3x5 card (front and back).  Adding to this....most folks think you actually have over 150 rights.....or so they heard over the radio.

The sad thing is.....more folks know more about NCAA football than first aid.

The sad thing is....more folks run out of gas on the highway each and every day.....than run out of toilet paper in their house each day.

The sad thing is....from the vast crowd of anti-American folks throughout the world who let you know daily that they are anti-American.....have a very short list of who to call if a Earthquake, tidal wave, meteor or invasion came to face their country.  In fact, it's just one listed nation that they would call.  You can guess which one.

The sad thing is....if you brought up the BP oil business from last year and asked folks which coast this was near.....you'd still have thirty percent of folks who would say Alaska.

The sad thing is....not a single teacher in America up until the 1990s....was ever suggested or recommended to be tested for competency.  Adding to this.....the vast number of teachers prior to the 1930s.....had one year of teaching college at best.

The sad thing is....Nevada Senator Harry Reid could accidentally show in any small town in America and tell folks his car broke down, and folks would actually drive him to a local garage for help....offer up a cup of coffee while he was waiting for the tow truck to arrive, and probably not even recognize the guy until two hours after he left and they turned Fox News on.

Finally, the sad thing is.....the number of folks believing in Bigfoot, aliens and that the President doesn't have a birth certificate....is now about the same percentage number.  Luckily, the number of folks believing in increasing taxes is higher.  It has to be an indicator that we're moving in the right direction.