Tuesday, 27 December 2011

The Underwear State

Alabama is one of these odd places where political folks meet in Montgomery and come up with varied ideas for laws.....which tend to rub folks in the wrong way.

This past week....a Democratic figure came up with the new bill....going after punk young guys who wear the pants several inches lower than their underwear.  It is the fashion....throughout the US.  But in Bama, it's started to bother folks.  You just don't want to see some 16 year old kid with pants about five inches lower than his underwear.

So the proposed bill says there would be a fine of $25-$150, if some law enforcement figure came to find you in such a condition, and gave you a ticket.  You can imagine this scene....wannabe Barney (your town's one and only cop) gets this ruler and starts to chase after seventeen year old punks.....to measure their pants-display.  With all the possible crime in the world.....he'd waste his time with folks displaying their underwear.

The problem with youth today....is that they want to do something that makes them odd and different. If a bunch of old guys started to wear their pants five inches lower than their underwear.....then they'd have to do something different....probably wear women's underwear instead, or wear green turtle-neck sweaters.

I see this likely passing and becoming a law.  The Republicans could stand up and fight it.....showing they want folks to have the right to wear pants five inches lower and that the government has no right to regulate underwear display (Ron Paul would say this).  The same guys would then want to regulate tube tops for women because too much is being displayed.

I see 2012 being an exciting year in Bama.  Guys will figure out that you just don't wear underwear and show off a lot of skin instead.  Then the state will have to mandate that all Bama men must wear underwear.

At the end of this mess....we end up with a reputation across America....as the underwear state.  It sure was a lot better when we were just the cotton state.

If it's not one thing.....it'd be another.