Barbers are always an interesting topic with me. As a kid growing up in Bama.....I can remember the 75-cent haircuts at the local barber. Two brothers ran the shop.....at for the first twenty years. A haircut took all of three minutes to accomplish and it wasn't until the early 1970s that they added a vacuum to get all the hair off your neck.
When I went off to the Air Force....my first haircut was free.....mostly because they removed almost every single hair on my head. When I finally got to tech school at Sheppard Air Force Base.....I found the friendly barbers there....charged around $2. I thought that was a bit hefty, but I would learn later.....it was standard pricing on any base.
When I got to Panama....I met up with these barbers who did razor-type cuts and you felt like a million bucks. The problem was that all haircuts were around five bucks by that point.
Later, I got to Ramstein and got used to sixty-minute waits....to get a haircut. The only magazines they offered were sports magazines. And the going rate was around $9.
I took a two-week vacation to Turkey in the mid-1990s....and this Turkish barber asked me if I wanted my ear-hair "fixed"? I said sure, and he lights up this Q-tip with some alcohol.....and then burns every hair on one side of my head. I was in mortal fear when I realized the flame business....but he took off the ear-hair on the other side, and it really felt pretty cool at that point. I vowed I'd never repeat that though.
When I got to Arlington.....for the first six months.....I was using some mall barbershop, and the rate was near $14. I came to discover the Pentagon barbershop.....run by Japanese ladies.....was only charging $12, and I switched over to them. Frankly, unless you really emphasize "a little bit".....they will cut every hair off your head.
Today, folks found out that the fancy barbershop over at the Senate building is about $300k in debt and only survives because the Senators found some method of dumping cash into the pot.
It was puzzling to me how you'd end up in $300k of debt, until they announced the pay scale of the four barbers who work there. They make $54,761; $70,349; $73,658; and $81,641....which is a fairly hefty sum of money for barbers. On top of that.....the government is handling their 401-K, their government health care, and paid leave.
To make this deal kinda work....a haircut ends up being $20, and a fancy highlight deal is around $105. Don't even ask about a shampoo, cut and air dry.
How many Senators use this barbershop? Well....nobody much is talking about that. About a quarter of the old guys barely even have hair growing. Course, their staffs would have access to the barbershop, but you'd have to wonder if these younger guys would even be willing to use the local barbershop. You can figure a decent barbershop over here in Arlington would probably run around $14.
I'm guessing a number of barbers back in Bama are eyeballing the $81k salary and wondering just how good this guy really is. Can he talk baseball? Does he have insight into Clint Eastwood movies? Does he know some catfish places in the local area? Has he met any famous NASCAR drivers? Did he pick up any secret info on Senator Roy Blunt? Does he know any women who give Japanese massage sessions? Has he got a special compound to darken gray hair?
So to keep the precious Senate barbershop in operation.....some joker pulled out $300k of your tax money, and ensured that it stayed in operation for another year. Maybe they'd be better off to just shut down that operation....give the Senators a Pentagon-entry pass, and let them use our Japanese ladies. Heck, for $12, they'd save enough money to have a beer. Afterwards, they could walk around the corner to the executive dining area, and have a club sandwich for $13, and a unlimited amount of ice tea (with nice fancy crushed ice). It might be a pretty good deal, if you ask me.
0 comments:
Post a Comment