Thursday, 5 December 2013

The Holy Senator

“I’m not ashamed to say that I believe in God and I believe in His word.  The Bible teaches us no one has all the answers–only God does. And neither political party’s always right.”

-- Words from Senator Mark Pryor (incumbent Arkansas Democratic senator)

On Tuesday evening out of Little Rock, Senator Pryor put up a new TV ad....which will kick off his re-election campaign for 2014.  It's more or less a "belief-in-God" stance, which tends to say that he never read the Affordable Healthcare Act but still voted for it, and he shouldn't get any real criticism for the frustrations of people around the state who might vote in the November election.

It's hard to say who suggested this gimmick in advertising for Pryor's campaign.  In Bama, you can quote scripture from the Bible for a campaign episode.....but typically....folks ask questions after you start doing it.

The questions usually are: are you repenting over your sins (Baptists usually care about this)?  How often do you actually attend services (anything less than three times a month leads to more difficult questions)?  Have you prayed for help (a response here has to be carefully written out....because you don't want to admit weakness as a Senator)?  Have you sipped alcohol in the past year (Bama folks tend to pass narrow judgement over folks who admit yes on that question)?

All of this religious stuff leads you around to feeling that Senator Pryor needs some Moses-like character to show up in Arkansas, and just plain get into the election business.  Moses would clean up corruption, run crooked political figures out of the state, and always ask if you read what you voted for.

I kinda think this was a bad election strategy.  In any debate situation.....the Republican guy will just note on every question.....I'm praying for Senator Pryor, but frankly, I think the devil has already got ahold of him.  You can imagine the eyes of naive Arkansas folks rolling twice over, and everyone now fearful that they'd have to call in some Catholic priest and do some exorcism-like ceremony to rid him of some bad influence.

Only my suggestion, but I think the safer thing here for Pryor to do.....is to hook up with some Miss America pageant winner, travel with some country and western band throughout the state, taking to wearing overalls with a John Deere hat, and act like you've been to a Baptist revival and got all cleansed.

Maybe that's enough to get fifty-one percent.

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