Monday, 28 September 2015

Things to Worry About

Things that I should really worry about:

1.  If my tetanus shot is current.

2.  If breakpads on the car are in decent shape.

3.  If there's a decent supply of toilet paper on hand.

4.  If it's a hefty amount of snow this winter.

The things that people urge me to worry about:

1.  The name Redskins.

2.  Whether the Alabama Governor is getting some on the side.

3.  Whether Hillary is bad-off health-wise.

4.  If climate change is occurring.

5.  If global cooling is occurring.

6.  If global warming is occurring.

7.  If Israel will get nuked by Iran.

8.  If threesome marriages start a trend after gay-marriage.

9.  If cops are shooting blacks at fantastic rates, or if blacks are shooting cops at fantastic rates.

10.  Some crazy guy will build a fence at the US-Mexico border.

11.  Some crazy guy will build a fence at the US-Canada border.

12.  North Korea will accidentally nuke itself.

13.  The Republicans will accidentally elect Jeb Bush to face Hillary.

14.  If Aliens are visiting the Earth.

15.  Bigfoot will be found.

16.  Eighty thousand high school kids will admit some lusty affair with their eighth grade science teacher.

17.  Ford will admit they could build a better car but say it's not worth all the hassle.

18.  Mexicans will leave the US in droves.....leaving a bunch of hard, wicked, and sweaty work for some American to do.

19.  Fox News hires a ninth-grade geography teacher to run a full hour on strictly geography information in the afternoon.

20.  Japan scientists will invent some life-like robot that does know.....everything....for $60,000.

21.  President Obama notes that he really is a Muslim guy and it's not a big deal.

22.  VP Joe Biden admits that he got drunk one night in 2013 and ended up in some Maryland hotel with some German tourists but doesn't remember much.

23.  NPR admits they've had an agenda-driven news deal for twenty years.

24.  England admits that the invasion by the Normans was all just a rigged up deal, scripted out and was necessary to get folks excited over something.

25.  The Germans admit that someone hacked into the VW coding business from the CIA and illegally created the diesel car crisis.

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