Sunday, 1 November 2015

The Attire Story

I read a particular blog from an Alabama site about once a week.  They do a four-star job on local events, happenings, crime, etc....on one particular area.  To be kind of honest, based on their writing skills and charming intellect.....I often get the impression that they aren't from around Bama, and are some transplant from New York City or Chicago.

This week....their forum discussion was about a county clerk official (elected) who had flipped from one party (Democrat) to another (Republican).  Typically in Alabama, this usually hints that the party apparatus in the county or state has given up on the person and will put another person up.....or it means that the new party has offered up some cash for your campaign, if you just flip over.

For some reason, this blogger had decided that this warranted a question or two, and had gone down to the county court house.  They'd gone through the metal detector and then wandered around to the right office....to find some front desk gal standing there and noting that such-and-such county clerk just wasn't there today.

Then.....there's this description of this moment....with the front desk gal, and a Steinbeck-like description.....noting an "attire or lack of attire problem".

Attire or lack of attire problem?

Yeah, but they end the paragraph and simply move on.

This leaves me in some state of dazed imagination.  Was the front desk gal wearing a tube-top two sizes too small?  Was the front desk gal wearing a ultra-short skirt?  Was the front desk gal wearing some fancy transparent silky blouse like those you buy in New York City?    Did the front desk gal have the top four buttons of her six button blouse undone (I noticed such dress behavior at a Detroit airport stand once)?  Was the front desk gal wearing a mini-skirt with fishnet stockings (like those Paris models wear)?  Was the front desk gal wearing a halter top but no bra?  Was the front desk gal wearing six-inch high heels?

Well....you just don't know.

Someone can sit there and write this fantastic simple sentence, and leave you sitting there for minutes, hours and even days....wondering....well, what the heck was this front desk gal at the county court house wearing or not wearing?

Hemingway would have written an entire chapter describing some slutty ensemble, with a fancy French-made garter-belt, a special blouse made only in Venice, and the sultry button arrangement on the blouse being undone.  You would have been amazed at the scene described and fantasized about it for days.

In this case.....well....you just don't know.

Personally, if I were in Alabama....or just visiting the state.....I'd have to go down to the county court house and just wander around to find this office and ask for the front desk gal....just to see what the heck they wear for attire.  Maybe it is floozy or harlot related....maybe it's just a plain Sears blouse that's two sizes too small.

At least, that would answer the attire question.