Our Bama Gal

My brother sent me this story out of the Sand Mountain area of Bama.

The best we can see...is that the local city department had been using their tractor and parked over near some carwash in town (Sumiton, if you wanted to know this), and then it up and went missing.

Someone apparently then asked around and referred things to some gal, Tiffany (we won't mention her entire name because it just isn't the gentlemanly thing to do in dragging a good ladies name in the dirt).

The cops then were on the chase for this gal, who would be later charged with first-degree tractor theft (a serious crime in Bama under any circumstance).

Witnesses alerted the cops to the fact that Tiffany was neatly and lustily dressed in a swimsuit of some type....left mostly to our imagination....as she swung out on highway 78 or Old Warrior Road (depending your view of highway naming).

The cops actually found Tiffany at her home, and she collapsed during heavy interrogation (probably three to five questions), and was prepared to point out the location of this tractor in question (somewhere on Brickyard Road).

Tractor stealing is a fairly serious crime in Bama. I'm guessing the cops will give the case over to the county DA, and Tiffany could be looking at two years in prison. If she were to fess real quick and admit alcohol or pills impaired her judgement, that she'd been a Baptist member for a while, or donated some money over to the Democratic Party of the state....she might get off with just four months in the county jail....just my humble guess.

The thing about this...is that it's likely trigger a severe emotional toll on Bama guys as they imagine this lusty gal in a swimsuit....maybe one of them Florida styles that make a guy weep.....riding a tractor.

I noticed throughout this story that they intentionally left the manufacturer of the tractor out of the story...so it's not a noted Massey Ferguson or John Deere. A bikini-clad gal on a John Deere would tear the heart out of most Bama guys.

So deep in the heart of Bama, Tiffany is out on bail (my guess) and taking a phonecall or two from local guys who'd be wondering if she was available on Friday night. The thing is that fall is quickly approaching and this bikini thing has a limit approaching. By mid-October, it'll be too late in the season to think much about this, and we will have all sunk into NCAA football by that point.