Friday, 9 October 2015

The Vegetarian Story

There was this British survey of vegetarians, and a shocker.

What they generally say is that around one-third of British vegetarians admit that when they get drunk (at the pub or at home).....they eat meat.

You can imagine the shock as Nigel wakes up with a hangover in his living room.  He's a confirmed vegetarian....for a decade or more.  He had a few drinks too many last night.  He doesn't remember much after the pub.  And there on the floor of the this big pizza box.....there's two slices left.....and it's loaded with pork, beef, and chicken.  Nigel looks at the remains and realizes that he consumed a large pizza last night.....with meat products.

After a while, Nigel will start to get depressed and question himself.  This was the great 'walk' of his life.....his theme.....his quest to be different and pure.  He and the crowd that he hung around.....were dedicated vegetarians.  He starts to question his culture and diet.

Nigel will call his friend Monty and confess what he did.  Monty.....ever the stoic vegetarian listens to the story.  With silence and a long pause after Nigel has completed his story.....Monty confesses that he too.....has failed at pure vegetarianism.  He gets drunk two or three times a week and ends up with McDonalds burger wrappers on the floor the next morning.....maybe five or six wrappers.  Together, they weep over their confessions.

It becomes a burden that neither can really they meet that evening at a local pub and talk over their pains and suffering....while sipping a stout ale.  Three hours will pass and the two vegetarians have consumed a fair amount of ale, and are fairly drunk.  They wobble out....fall down a couple of times....and make their way to the local pizza shop where they order the meat-lovers XXL pizza.  This becomes a routine......week after week....every Friday night....the two vegetarians gather, confess their sins, consume a vast amount of ale, and eat a meat-lovers pizza.

Across all of the UK, it's the same story.  Across Europe, it's the same story.  Across the US, it's probably the same story. hindering society from being pure vegetarian.   Who would have guessed?

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