Wednesday, 10 March 2010

My Coined Management Phrases

In my fifteen years at Ramstein...in uniform and in civilian clothing....I coined five management phrases. About twice a year....I'll throw each of the phrases out....and catch someone off guard...who will ask me what the hell I uttered. Then I have to related the phrase and the meaning. As far as I know....I own the phrases...but everyone is welcome to use them.

"Einstein's brother": typically a engineer guy who has lots of college and certificates but can't seem to utilize anything he ever learned and is generally useless. In the contractor world...we occasionally hire folks like this.

"Bon-Jovi-syndrome": A mental disease where you claim you know everybody...in the organization, in the local area, and sometimes even important people...but the truth is that you really don't know folks beyond their face and that's about it.

"DDD-Manager": Typically a leader who steps into the room and can assume leadership over a moment of chaos and determine where the focus of the group should go. And you typically know their abilities within seconds. Yes, it's kinda like some gal with a 44DDD tube top walking into the midst of a discussion....if you can imagine that.

"Hitler-Youth-Leader": In the military, at various stages...you send some guy off to some military leadership school...and then they come back. Seven out of ten guys are normal when they come back....no changes. Two guys chat a bunch over leadership and organization. And then you have the HYL guy...who desperately wants to take Air Force management ideas and try to make them work in the real world. They spend two or three months arguing with people before they finally give up and act normal.

"Barnyard Cubicle": This is a modular office area where personal habits and sanitary practices have gone beyond health expectations. Typically....you have to have a commander walk over to the guy and demand a clean-up.

A Lesson in Life

I live next door to Montogmery County, Maryland. It was reported in the paper today....some teacher identified some 16-year old girl who was inappropriately dressed. So the teacher called for a security guy, and the teacher escorted the girl up to the principal's office. Somewhere in between...the teacher said that the girl was dressed "like a prostitute".

The girl and her mama decided that that statement by the teacher was highly inappropriate...so they demanded the school make the teacher apologize. The teacher apparently did so.

I sat there...pondering over this a while. What the school and newspaper didn't show....was a picture of the 16-year old "hooker". Even the girl and her mother....didn't offer up a picture of the outfit she wore that day.

I'm guessing...that the girl wore something that got her points on the boy scale. I'm also guessing that mom doesn't get the point...nor does she care. The chief lesson learned here? If you think some gal is dressed like a whore....never say it to their face...just whisper it behind their back.

Five Bits

There are five notes from yesterday.

First, this Representative Massa interview on Glenn Beck. I sat and watched the first fifteen minutes...and then turned it to the History Channel. This guy Massa is totally unreliable and bogus. Half of what he says...just might be true....but the other half really doesn't come off as even being a good lie.

Second, Supreme Court Chief Justice Roberts came out yesterday in a news item...while doing a college lecture moment...and basically said that the State of the Union episode is now a "pep-rally". No one is much arguing about this. I probably noticed this twenty years ago and frankly...if there was a choice of WWE wrestling or the State of the Union...I'd probably watch wrestling. I can remember as a kid...where no one in the entire community watched the State of the Union episode.

Third, the Legislative Analyst's office for the state of California....neither Democrat or Republican....admits that modest job losses are very likely in the near future in regard to the state's aggressive climate change policy. They avoided saying their best guess number. So, just another reason why you might end up sponsoring a bankrupt California in the future.

Fourth, the guy who runs the senate's internet service....has deemed the Drudge Report as a potential virus site. So he wants staffers...particularly the young punks who surf for the senator's all day....to steer clear. Now, I will say this...unlike alot of sites...Drudge does have cookies attached to his site and it's not as friendly as it ought to be....but to say it's a potential virus site...is kinda like hinting the Russian mafia runs all the gas stations in New Jersey (it's only 10 percent of them).

Fifth, Senator Scott Brown....you know....our new replacement of Teddy from Cape Cod state....is writing his memoirs. It will be published next year. Now...if you were a betting guy...you'd start to look at the odds of him running against President Obama in 2012. I realize it's a long shot....but it's a pretty strong hint of something coming down the road shortly.

Bringing the Internet to the Boonies

The White House is fixing up an idea where free wireless Internet service will be run out to you poor folks in the rurals of America. The Federal Communications Commission is high on this idea currently.

So there are two plans....one is free...and the other would be low-cost.

The drive to this idea? Sadly....for you folks out in the boonies of America....especially Bama....at least one-third of you suffer without home broadband service.

This means little 13-year old Johnny can't chat with his Bolivian girlfriend who says she's 13 but she's really 44.

This means farmer Ben will finally get the latest hot lusty videos from the Ukraine every morning before he runs off to the fields.

This means that farmer Ben's wife...Charley....will finally be able to chat with her British online lover Martin...who is unemployed and seeking a new wife.

This means that Uncle Jimmy will finally be able to get a Russian wife....if all the visa paperwork goes through.

This means Ms Watkins who teaches in the local school can finally find that weird and kinky Japanese video club where they do funny things with eight foot of rope.

For some reason....the government's belief in this being a good thing...is a question with me. The true cost of this move? That's something that I would speculate is not really understood. This could get into the tens of billions if you consider the remote nature of America. Imagine half of the state of Montana being in this situation....and you have to put up various field sites. And the low-cost angle? I don't see how it stays low-cost.

But this is a wonderful thing...kinda like when electricity first came or when the first Ford Model-T came. Well...it ought to be.